"Osama, Osama, Osama! Can't we have a commission about something nice for a change?"
"I'm glad it's over. The way that investigation was dragging on, I was almost beginning to wish that 9/11 had never even happened."
"I wrote a report about 8/20 that I think you should read. It's called My Birthday And What I Want For It."
"Great timing! I just finished Bergdorf Blondes, and I've been looking for another good beach read."
"Eh, the whole thing is pretty tame. Now, Ken Starr—there was a man who could write a juicy report."